I’m Not Fearless

Some days, like today, I struggle with self worth.  I wake up in the morning with the desire to get ‘things done’ and then for whatever reason I get behind schedule. 

Some days, like today, I worry that I won’t be good enough to make this business work.

Have you ever felt this way?  That you have a passion?   A deep desire to make a difference in the world AND at your core you know you are meant to share it…  

But then doubt creeps in, my saboteur creeps in and tells me that I don’t have what it takes.   SIGH.  Although she is such a bitch and I want to tell her to fuck off there is a part of me that listens to her.  

What IF I can’t do this?  What if she is right?  What if I can’t’ express to people why I want to work with them?  How I think I can help them….   What if I… FAIL??  

It is with those words that I hear myself say, so what?  So what if you try this and you fail.  Wouldn’t It be worse if you just didn’t do it?  Isn’t not trying far worse than failing?

When I was 44 years old I decided to compete in my first every Body Building Competition.  Most women retire at that age.  My WHY was very strong though.  I had told my kids that they could accomplish ANYTHING they wanted to if they:

1. Have a desire.
2. Set a goal.
3. Measure their results
4. Adjust their behaviour to achieve said goal OR  
5. Adjust their goal – sometimes you think you want something and then find out that it you didn’t set a high enough goal OR the goal can be reached but not in the timeframe you set out.  

My WHY was so strong that it helped me overcome all of my fears.  Fear of losing my husband because he would be jealous, fear of looking silly on stage at my age, fear of not achieving goal, (AKA failing), fear of being judged by my father, fear of what people would say.  

In the midst of fear I hear myself say… so what?  So what if you try this and it doesn’t work out?   In the midst of the fear I draw myself tall and breath deep.  I remember my why.  

I have a message inside of me that I want other women to hear.  At our core we grow up with ‘you are not good enough’.  It’s nobody’s ‘fault’ it just is.  

I want to shout from the rooftop that you are good enough, worthy enough to achieve anything you want to all you have to do is.

1. Have a desire.
2. Set a goal.
3. Measure your results along the way.
4. Adjust.

YOU at your core ARE WORTHY.